You know that feeling in the pit of your stomach, that feeling that you have when something really unpleasant has happened and you don’t want to deal with it. Or you have dealt with it but the feeling just refuses to go away but clings onto you and eats into your mind until you begin to feel physically sick? That’s what I am feeling right at this moment and have been feeling ever since last evening.
Nothing really fazes me out too much, I tend to take things quite calmly most of the time but once in a while however calm and cool you otherwise are, there are certain things that happen that you cannot deal with calmly. In hindsight I do think I could have handled it a lot better than I did but emotions get in the way of a person behaving rationally sometimes. And that is exactly what happened to me. I know I am being quite cryptic about the whole situation but I don’t want to go into the gory details though I do believe that I did do the right thing at the end of it all.
Though things have been done and sorted, that feeling in the pit of my stomach refuses to go away. I sit at work with my hands trembling, I haven’t been able to digest anything since last evening and I feel like throwing up every five minutes. I don’t feel like talking to anybody and wish I could disappear off the radar for the next few weeks.
I don’t usually let myself feel like this and always talk to myself and sort things out in my head though this time that just doesn’t seem to be working. I do wish this feeling disappears quickly. I don’t feel myself at all.